Fact: I am a liar.
I’m going to the fucking moon. Don’t ask questions. I’M JUST GOING OKAY?!
This is the worst blog ever.
A man from Moscow named Chekhov
Found himself with quite a bad cough.
As he hacked,
And his penis literally fell off.
There is only ONE google result for the exact phrase “his penis literally fell off.” Can we rectify this please? Make it your good deed for the day. Post a complete sentence with the phrase in it. “I was talking to Jimmy in recess when his face turned ghostly white. I looked down and he shook his trouser leg: turns out, his penis literally fell off.”
Why is it that on mockumentary shows, no one knows anything “secret” from the last season in the next one? For instance, on The Office, Dwight and Angela were secretly together for a couple seasons and the audience was fully aware. But no one in the office knew.
If you were being filmed all day, wouldn’t you, at some point, sit together with your coworkers and watch this stuff?
A unicorn is just a horse with a petrified penis stuck to its head.
A True Story About A Lie I Once Told
Once in high school, I walked into my History class 20 minutes late. Naturally, my teacher asked where I had been. I told him I was attacked by rabid Manchester United fans. My teacher, who was a die hard Liverpool fan, laughed and told me to sit down.
Moses supposes his toes are roses….
But Moses is FUCKING WRONG.
1, 2, 3, 4. Benjamin Franklin